Dear Barack

by Irritable Pundit 8. February 2010 05:00

 Brushfire of Freedom

The Irritable Pundit

A letter, written on the back of a copy of the constitution, falls from his hand.  As he walks away, I pick it up and read...

"Barack, 

I could not possibly feel worse about this.  I know this is a surprise, but we have to talk.  I'm sorry, but we can't see each other anymore. 

Don't take that too hard. Lord knows over the last year and a half I couldn't see you any less (and I tried).  

Look, we made a promise to each other, and I know you probably can't understand this, but you just don't live up to the hype.  To listen to you talk, we've had some good times together, but I don't remember the good times you keep mentioning. All I can remember is you talking and talking and talking, telling me how good it's going to be one second, then telling me how good its been the last year. Did I blink?  Where was the magic? 

Truthfully, you bore me. You seemed all exciting and new, but you just couldn't "deliver" where it mattered (if you know what I mean).  You said you were going to "Barack my world," but you just made me want to go to sleep.  And no, I didn't really have a headache, I was just tired of promises unfulfilled. You are all "Sham!", no "Wow!".

You made a lot of promises baby, but all you did was max out my credit cards. Don't even try to deny it. Don't you dare! I know for sure SOMEONE went through my purse.  No no, don't act like I'm crazy. I had several TRILLION dollars in there. I know I did! 

I know your name is on the lease for the next 3 years, but don't expect any affection, and no we can't sleep in the same room. And yes, I have been spending a lot of time with that girl Sarah I met at a Tea Party, but that's not what is happening here (not that there is anything wrong with that). 

Listen, it's not you, it's me! 

Well no... actually it's you. I'm just not that into you anymore, OK?

Don't go around pouting about this either. You know you look like a spoiled child when you stick your lip out like that.

 

Sincerely,

Lady Liberty"

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Copyright 2010.  The published content is the sole property of the author.  Any copy, use, or redistribution of any portion of the material without the written consent of the owner is a violation of international copyright laws.

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February 8. 2010 12:25
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The opinions expressed herein are my own personal opinions and do not represent my employer's view in anyway.

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