Brushfire of Freedom
The Irritable Pundit
So, now that the Tea Parties are over, and the various talking heads (and other body parts) have dissected, dismissed and denied, what do we take from this rather fascinating grass roots event? How about a few awards from your own Irritable Pundit? That sounds great you say? Very well then!
Ladies and gentlemen... Welcome to the IP Awards!
Please! No, no! Please stop! You are embarrassing me! If everyone could just stop cheering for a moment... please!
Thank you, thank you, you are too kind! Dear friends, we have to move forward!
OK, ok... now, lets get to it!
Our first award recipient is often described as "plucky" by those who know their chicks! Her message is one of world peace, slavish adoration to a cult leader, and that to be anti-tax is to be anti-CNN! Will we ever see such a wonderful example of bias again in our lifetimes? Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, Susan Roesgen!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmllpJKlVhg
Susan has set a new low, and for this we owe her a debt of gratitude! Thank you Susan, for being such a shining example of what passes for journalism at CNN. Anyone watching (and apart from Youtube that would have been, what, 6 people?) can certainly see she deserves this first award of the night. And so, for the most obvious example of journalistic bias (so far) this year, The Irritable Pundit awards Susan Roesgen... the "Olby"!!! Nice job Susan!
Our second award recipient is a hollywood legend and has received extraordinary reviews for her work!
"I laughed I cried, it's Bush's fault!" - The LA Times
"A triumph of egalitarian high-brow sensibilities whilst solipsistically conveying the indeterminable anti-sense of someone desperate for a bowel movement!" - The NY Times
"Dude, seriously, pass the Dorritos. Anyway... wait, what?" - High Times
Yes, tonight's honoree has managed to prove all those things and more with her incredible diatribe that to protest taxes is to be a racist redneck! Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Janeane Garofalo!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jAAHMDpk7Ik
Isn't she amazing folks? For the greatest gratuitous knee-jerk response in defense or praise of Obama, I award her the coveted Mathews "Tingle" Trophy!
Our Third award recipient makes the amazing connection that to protest taxes is to be a terrorist, as both things start with a "T"! Here is Janet Napolitano!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WM1nGrvmgo4
Some of you might be wondering about the link here, but it is really very simple. For attempting to use every means at her disposal, including making things up whole cloth in a rushed hit-job to lessen the potential number of tea party participants, I award Janet Neapolitan (I know thats not the spelling, but it cracks the Irritable Pundit up)... the "Sharpton Award"! Way to go Janet Napolitano! Reno has nothing on you other than flammable gasses!
Finally our greatest award recipients are being honored for ensuring that to protest taxes is to be invisible! Most middle of the road observers put total attendance around 500,000 nationwide. Some participant groups go much further (http://www.hench.net/2009/teaparty.htm), while tonight's award winners consistently reported the numbers much lower based on partial lists of rallies! Yes, they weren't even aware of the actual number of places holding Tea Parties, but to be fair they didnt want to know so don't hold that against them! That would require "reporting" after all, and we can't have that! And so, I award the Main Street Media... the MSM award! Hmmm, that was anti-climactic wasn't it? There are few things more completely full of crap than the MSM, so there isn't much to belittle them with is there? Oh wait, of course! (ahem)...
I award the Main Street Media... the "Obama"!
That's all we have for you tonight dear friends! We'll see you again soon and until then remember, the Irritable Pundit loves you all!
Thank you! Thank you! You are too kind!
No, no, seriously! I have to go!
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